"you've got my sunglasses!"

*photo by me. july 2008.

i am notoriously bad at owning sunglasses.

i also always happen to pick out the cutest [cheap] pairs which thus leads to my absolute heart break when i accidentally, and ultimately always, step on them.

i bought two pairs the other day.

one a retro, funky peachy-pink pair.

the other, because i couldn't pass up their 2.99 price tag, with a cut-out heart in between the frames.

anyways, the boy said to me, "make 'em last 2 months"

it was a challenge. one i most earnestly took to heart.

most sunglasses i own, or at least attempt to own, last tops, 2 weeks.

did i mention i am horrible at keeping track of my shades?

but my friends, it's this goal to impress my boy that has kept them alive these 1.2 weeks since their original purchase.

and that is the thing.

he makes me want to be better.

constant room for improvement when i think of him.

not like i'm not good enough.

but i want to be the best i can be.

each morning there is incentive to be healthy, to read my scriptures, and to be loving.

so come two months from now, i'll be sporting this same pair of sunglasses, maybe a few pounds lighter, and all around more happy.

and you know what?

i like new [more goal oriented] me better anyways.

i'm not sure where i stand.

* photo by me. december 2005

i need freshman friends.

people are always asking, "so what ya studying?"

beats the heck outta me

i should know, right? everyone here has their act together.

and i thought i did know.

ask me a few months ago and i wouldn't have thought twice about the answer.

photography!

but recently. i'm not feeling it.

which is funny.

err. i mean ironic?

see, i got this design assistant job and all i do is take pictures all day.

well, not anything super glamorous, but a camera is in my hands. all day.

half of me, oh man i hate to admit this, feels like i'm better than the "photography program"

and with enough practice, i'd probably be able to figure it out on my own. and get a degree in something else. like creative advertising or graphic design.

but then, my other half, and oh man i hate admitting this too, thinks what if, what if i'm not good at anything else??

sometimes i feel like other people feel this way too.

"if not photography then whaaaat?"

and almost, in my heart, i feel like 'photography' is a cop out major.

well, i know it's not. it's not as easy as people think.

but you know, these days, everyone is a 'photographer'.

oh bleh. i write posts to recieve insight. so that by the last sentence i've figured it out.

but i'm more confused than ever.

and i haven't talked to the boy all day.

my fault. i'm lame today.

school can't start soon enough.

love sick

sometimes, i'm surprised at myself.

i have to rewind and look back on things.

i never even had a boyfriend in high school.

i have one week before i graduate.

and then i meet him.

he's cute, funny, clever, and romantic.

he writes me letters and folds them into paper hearts.

it takes me only a few days to be swept off my feet.

"you've fallen hard for this boy"

that's what my friends say.

i am leaving. i can't like him. it won't last.

but i can't help it. he does everything right.

i'm going to college. that's where you are supposed meet prince charming. i can't be in this relationship. it just won't work.

but then. everyday my heart longs for him.

we joke. we tease about marriage. just maybe.

but he is everything i've ever dreamed up. everything i've ever wanted.

"can i love you forever?" he asks.

please do.

he makes me whole.

he's my best friend.

all i know is i've never felt so happy in all my life.

love is the best high in the world.

you only live once

dear boyfriend,

someday we are getting married. and then you'll have to work hard everyday. while you are gone i'll be mom. i will always have creative crafts and activities to do with the kids. but maybe somedays i will declare it pajama day. and then we'll eat cereal for all three meals. and instead of planning fun projects, we'll camp out in front of my computer, make silly faces and laugh together.

boyfriend, i'll be a great mom. i promise.

oh and one last thing boyfriend.

you are the best ever.

love you always,

emily

love, pizza, and fourth of july.

My entire dad's side of the family met at my grandparents house this fourth of July.

My dad is the oldest of 8 children. He has 7 younger sisters.

Each of these sisters has a million plus children.

Why yes, it was a party.

We kicked off the weekend with a mini carnival in the backyard.

There was a jump house, bungee run, and cup cake walk.

And even a little face painting.

After the carnival my aunts swarmed the kitchen for this year's foodie throw down, a very legitimate pizza making contest.

We even invited neighbors to unbiasly judge.

Because I seem to be the resident photographer in the family I sat everyone down, all 289897 kids included, and set my camera on a tripod, ran into the frame, crossed my fingers for a good turn out and took a giant family photo. Whudya think?

As the sun finally set, we gathered on the front porch and blasted Michael Jackson.

This was a dance contest.

My dad doesn't mind looking ridiculous. Ever.

We played with sparklers until our heart's were content.

There was even time to write a secret message for my love. 1437? I love you forever.

A good 4th of July?

Nah. A fabulous 4th of July.

all these photos were posted in the name of love for cjane's photo contest. here.

it's official